Spouse Visa - Difficult Marriage - Pls Help

[snehal125]

Hi all
I am being in an emotionally suffering. I married to my British citizen wife in Jan and came here in July 2015 since then our relationship is not stable.my wife was depressed because of lots of pressure and work she had to do to bring me up here in UK.And because of that depression her mental health was not stable. We had lots or arguments and blame was all over me. My in laws were also in support of her and blame me for everything. I don't have to say much and in relationship we had arguments but in ours she was so much angry and wanted to die , scratch herself in her body saying this is way she controls herself, she had said so many bad words to me, she even thrown food over ground and told me to eat , she had hit me on my hand twice in her anger. Right now she told me that she need space and I don't understand what space she needed. Apart from that she and my in laws have threaten me to call home office and deport me back in India.
Moreover in these four months we had good time but much time we argued so much so that my in laws have to involve in this. I always use to be calm in every argument and she been furious.
She said she hates me so much now . She wants to be separate with me now but always says me this is your last chance.
I don't know what to do now? I have feelings for this girl but now I feel there is no hope to get her back after she disrespect me in this way saying bad words, using sarcasm every time, hitting me.
If they call home office should police come home and take me to jail until my deportation?
If I get separate and my in laws try to hit me or hurt me what shall I do?
I want a peace full separation now and no more arguments but I can't say to her and in laws as they are threating me.
Please help me!!!!!!!

[CR001]

I have moved your post to it own thread here.

[Casa]

Are you registered with the same GP (doctor) as your wife? If so, it would be a good idea to talk to him in confidence about your wife's mental state. Bear in mind that domestic violence isn't simply physical...it is psychological abuse as well. You are entitled to report this to your doctor for it to be put on record and consider applying for a Domestic Violence visa (DV) if you are forced to separate due to unacceptable treatment by your wife and her family.

[snehal125]

Thanks casa,
But here I don't want to file any domestic violence. Right now we aren't talking with each other. I am treated like a guest by my in law family and also my wife. She is happy with her family because her family know that if they tell her anything she ll do anything wrong and they can't lose their daughter. I understand their situation. But right not my wife is not talking with me. Treating me like a guest and we just staying apart. I don't know what to do now? She is leaving her job now because that make her stress too and our argument.
Even though I wait for her to come out of this mental state, and if there is argument in future and I know there will be argument I don't want her to be like that what she did in her anger as she said she has such type of crazy anger.
Even if we argue in future that threatening will be always be there for me that they ll throw me out of country.
I just don't know!!!!!!

[Tier 4]

You feel sorry for her, I feel sorry for u. That's very typical behaviour by the way, superiority complex very common in diaspora of many communities n they don't hesitate to transfer it to their young generation , which actually have broken many families.

If u wants to tolerate it its up to u, otherwise there r ways to dealing such situations. But what ever step u take ll make em more furious n against u. Citizen advice bureau is one of many options.

Just remember you have every right to be here but they don't have any right to exploit , undermine and infuriate u.

[snehal125]

Dear friends,
I just don't understand what to do with my wife. I ll tell you all my whole story.
In India I have done some mistakes which she felt hurt like I am my all cousin went to dinner party and I was with my cousin and my wife wasn't hungry at that time but my brother asked her about drink to her and so she feel in her mind that my husband doesn't care me. Secondly we had Katha at my aunty home and she was with my family and I just went to home and she feel like I have left her there. This was all new for us.
In our honey moon I was being stinky and so she was angry and at mall I just asked help to buy something for everyone and she just said no so I lose her hand and asked to sale assistant to help me in buying good stuff and I don't look back at her. And so she feel again I left her.
When we are together I had applied for a job coz I had left my job in India and was searching over here. I had applied some jobs and I got an interview which I told her before applying I don't tell her that I am applying coz I just searching job and whatever is good I applied don't know if lucky I got interview and so she got angry that without her consent why did I apply. I went to interivew and got selected and she left her home got angry try to kill herself and all this. After than our relation isn't good. We are been constantly arguing and she can't forget it. And all what I have said above post has happen to me. But right now I am in so much trouble and one day I asked that I need your decision but ultimately she back fire me and asked my decision and i told her that I want this relation but it still not working as husband wife. One morning I asked her help to find job but she straight away said that she ll help but it upto you now whether you want this realtionship then you decide what you want to do. Please I want to ask you all that what shall I do.

[Casa]

Firstly, this isn't a marriage counselling forum, it's for help on immigration issues. This may sound harsh, but with respect, no one can advise you here on how to make your relationship work. I advised in a previous post that you should speak in confidence to your GP about getting help for your wife's mental condition which you wrote earlier appeared to be the root of the problem.