Post
by ellibelly92 » Sun Feb 28, 2016 3:42 pm
Hello would very much appreciate some advice.
I am a British citizen I was born here. My husband was a student from Pakistan. We got married in 2007. We have 2 children. Our married life has ups and downs, but there is a lot of interference from my husbands parents, mostly mother and his sisters. i have been to pakistan one since i was married my son was 6 months old, when i was there my in laws basically took my son off me, would never let me hold him, or look after him and I was practically locked in a windowless room for the entire 30 days I was there, I think the only reason they let me free was because my mothers family got involved. I have not been back since. When my husband was around his family he is totally different, when its just me and his kids hes so loving and caring.
My husband is now British. My mother in law dislikes me a lot, she thinks I have pulled him away from her, which isn't true, I have never stopped him, always encourage him to phone and visit them, because i believe in karma, i don't want my son not to bother with me when im older. I have not visited Pakistan since, I refuse to, as I am afraid how they will treat me and my daughter, they have a very strong dislike of girls, their own daughters they love, but time and time again they have made clear their disappointment at us having a daughter, like it was in our control, regardless of their negativity i love my daughter to the moon and back.
Anyway our financial situation is not so fantastic, we are in quiet a bit of debt, but my husband borrowed some money about a year back from a friend to inflate his bank statements in order to sponsor his parents to com here. My mil is 69 and fil is 72. they have one daughter left in Pakistan, 2 daughters in America and one daughter and 2 sons including my husband here in the uk. Their other son is British through work permit and their daughter through asylum. They have a total of 7 grandchildren here too.
my husband applied for their visa in September 2015 but it got refused because my in-laws paid a large amount of money into their bank account just before their application. They last visited the uk in 2003 and 2004. my mother in-law was in hospital for like 3 weeks last time she was here because she suffered a heart attack, they did not pay for any treatment.
anyway that's the back story. my husband has been told now by a solicitor, not to apply for their visas together that they are more likely to get it if they apply one after the other with like a months break. on their application they didn't mention their other kids here, the solicitor said this will make it less likely for them to be granted a visa and that it would not be checked anyway. I cannot say to my husband not to call his parents, but i do not want them here, they can at the click of a finger make my life hell from 10 thousand miles away I hate to think what they are going to do if they actually get here.
They have their own house in Pakistan, some land, family, my father in law gets a pension and have some fixed deposits. my husband has been sending money so that they dont have to use their pension so it makes it look as though they have a healthy bank account.
Our house is in my name, the mortgage too. I am so scared for me and my kids, is there anyway that I can stop them coming here without my husband knowing? I do not trust them or my husband when he is around them.
thank you for taking a look and for any replies.