Relationship with married visa applicant want to be together

[rebers]

Please help urgently.

I have been having a replationship with a married non EU visa applicant and she is probabaly due to her visa sometime in the next month. She has been married for 2 years and completed her application in the middle of Jan. We are desperate to be together but we dont know what the implications are if she left her british husband for me (I am also British)

A further complication is that she has a daughter that lives in her home country in Thailand with a very elderly grandmother (I know I have met her) who does the best she can but it isn't good enough and the child is suffering as a consequence.

She is going out to Thailand in June for 2 months to visit her remaining family and bring her daughter with her sometime in August.

I need such a lot of help in sorting everthing out. I contacted the Immigratrion and Nationality Directorate who were a mixture of quite rude, unfeeling and reasonably unhelpful, who actually tried to put the phone down on me, I assume because it was 4.40pm and wanted to go home?

Im scared and dont know who to turn to for some much needed help, where do i start. I have no intention of robbing the counrty of funds in the form benefits as i earn a good salary and I also want to make sure things are legal and not tkae a chance in her getting deported if the home office find out she applied for 1 visa and actually shouldn't have. HELP PLEASE?!!?

[stedman]

What is it you need help with? Is leaving her to get on with her marriage not an option?

[rebers]

Not when its a marriage of convienience!!! Maybe I should rephrase my query. Any useful information please?

[Wanderer]

If it's a marriage of convenience then I'd imagine she's in deep doo-doo.

Are you saying she fraudulently used a marriage visa to gain entry the to the UK? Answer this first then we can maybe help you.

[rebers]

she first came here with him on the 6 month holiday visa then married him. They have then since applied for the marriage vise filling the set(m) form out? This was done in Jan. She met me in Nov. She would have stayed with him I think if I had not come along, but who knows really? I know she will stay with me but this ius the thing how do we change the application or make a new one or what, I just need some really good advise on how we can work this out and be together legally. We have no intention of pulling a fast one on the system, which is why i contacted the home office about this but they were no use? They basically told me to shop her to them? That was all they told me really.

[olisun]

Is the child from the current marriage or from a previous relationship?

[rebers]

From a previous relationship in Thailand no contact what so ever with father doesn't even know where he lives he wants nothing to do with child who is 5 this year.

[jes2jes]

I am not trying to judge you but what business do you have with another man's spouse in the first place?

If you love the woman as you said, why don't you allow her to get a divorce and then you can continue your relationship or move out of the current spouse's home to yours and then you can do the decent thing.

Please, do not break someone's home to repair yours. Find your own woman or else wait for the right thing to be done. No wonder the HO representative hung up on you. You should not do that. Find another woman or go to Thailand and find a Thai woman if that is your preference but do not break someone's marrigae.

In your own words':

She would have stayed with him I think if I had not come along, but who knows really?

So get out of the picture mate!

[Wanderer]

she first came here with him on the 6 month holiday visa then married him. They have then since applied for the marriage vise filling the set(m) form out? This was done in Jan. She met me in Nov. She would have stayed with him I think if I had not come along, but who knows really? I know she will stay with me but this ius the thing how do we change the application or make a new one or what, I just need some really good advise on how we can work this out and be together legally. We have no intention of pulling a fast one on the system, which is why i contacted the home office about this but they were no use? They basically told me to shop her to them? That was all they told me really.

I'm not sure but I don't think you can marry on a VV. Plus I don't think SET(M) is the right form is it?, correct me if I'm wrong guys!

[rebers]

This is what im trying to do I would be happy to leave them to it and for them to get a divorce without my interference, but i just need to know what the process would be. Does she cancel her application get divorced then live with me then apply again? If so what type of visa does she apply for. Anyway much as i appreciate replies to my post i do not really want a cacophony of self righteous platitudes, no offence but they are not really constructive or helpful. Sorry.

I need some good sound legal advice about the best thing to do, what our situation is and not have the morality of it barked at me, otherwise I would have contacted the Dear Deardrie in the Sun.

[rebers]

she first came here with him on the 6 month holiday visa then married him. They have then since applied for the marriage vise filling the set(m) form out? This was done in Jan. She met me in Nov. She would have stayed with him I think if I had not come along, but who knows really? I know she will stay with me but this ius the thing how do we change the application or make a new one or what, I just need some really good advise on how we can work this out and be together legally. We have no intention of pulling a fast one on the system, which is why i contacted the home office about this but they were no use? They basically told me to shop her to them? That was all they told me really.

I'm not sure but I don't think you can marry on a VV. Plus I don't think SET(M) is the right form is it?, correct me if I'm wrong guys!

The Home office has contacted her about more info back in feb and there wasn't any problems. It was the right form for them, maybe i didn't explain it very well sorry.

[Wanderer]

This is what im trying to do I would be happy to leave them to it and for them to get a divorce without my interference, but i just need to know what the process would be. Does she cancel her application get divorced then live with me then apply again? If so what type of visa does she apply for. Anyway much as i appreciate replies to my post i do not really want a cacophony of self righteous platitudes, no offence but they are not really constructive or helpful. Sorry.

I need some good sound legal advice about the best thing to do, what our situation is and not have the morality of it barked at me, otherwise I would have contacted the Dear Deardrie in the Sun.

She can't get a divorce until after 12mnths anyway, but I would still question the validity of the marriage if she married on a VV.

I think ultimately shes gonna have to go home to regularise here stay here so she's 100% legal to avoid serios grief in the future.

[rebers]

This is what im trying to do I would be happy to leave them to it and for them to get a divorce without my interference, but i just need to know what the process would be. Does she cancel her application get divorced then live with me then apply again? If so what type of visa does she apply for. Anyway much as i appreciate replies to my post i do not really want a cacophony of self righteous platitudes, no offence but they are not really constructive or helpful. Sorry.

I need some good sound legal advice about the best thing to do, what our situation is and not have the morality of it barked at me, otherwise I would have contacted the Dear Deardrie in the Sun.

She can't get a divorce until after 12mnths anyway, but I would still question the validity of the marriage if she married on a VV.

I think ultimately shes gonna have to go home to regularise here stay here so she's 100% legal to avoid serios grief in the future.

Sorry she cant get a divorce until after 12months of what?

[Wanderer]

This is what im trying to do I would be happy to leave them to it and for them to get a divorce without my interference, but i just need to know what the process would be. Does she cancel her application get divorced then live with me then apply again? If so what type of visa does she apply for. Anyway much as i appreciate replies to my post i do not really want a cacophony of self righteous platitudes, no offence but they are not really constructive or helpful. Sorry.

I need some good sound legal advice about the best thing to do, what our situation is and not have the morality of it barked at me, otherwise I would have contacted the Dear Deardrie in the Sun.

She can't get a divorce until after 12mnths anyway, but I would still question the validity of the marriage if she married on a VV.

I think ultimately shes gonna have to go home to regularise here stay here so she's 100% legal to avoid serios grief in the future.

Sorry she cant get a divorce until after 12months of what?

After marriage.

[rebers]

This is what im trying to do I would be happy to leave them to it and for them to get a divorce without my interference, but i just need to know what the process would be. Does she cancel her application get divorced then live with me then apply again? If so what type of visa does she apply for. Anyway much as i appreciate replies to my post i do not really want a cacophony of self righteous platitudes, no offence but they are not really constructive or helpful. Sorry.

I need some good sound legal advice about the best thing to do, what our situation is and not have the morality of it barked at me, otherwise I would have contacted the Dear Deardrie in the Sun.

She can't get a divorce until after 12mnths anyway, but I would still question the validity of the marriage if she married on a VV.

I think ultimately shes gonna have to go home to regularise here stay here so she's 100% legal to avoid serios grief in the future.

Sorry she cant get a divorce until after 12months of what?

After marriage.

shes been married 2 years

[Wanderer]

She can't get a divorce until after 12mnths anyway, but I would still question the validity of the marriage if she married on a VV.

I think ultimately shes gonna have to go home to regularise here stay here so she's 100% legal to avoid serios grief in the future.

Sorry she cant get a divorce until after 12months of what?

After marriage.

shes been married 2 years

Right - I think then in that case she can apply for ILR as she has done on SET(O).

Once she gets that she's here to stay, divorce, remarry at her leisure.

[rebers]

Sorry she cant get a divorce until after 12months of what?

After marriage.

shes been married 2 years

Right - I think then in that case she can apply for ILR as she has done on SET(O).

Once she gets that she's here to stay, divorce, remarry at her leisure.

Well if that works, which i hope it does then you have made me a very happy chappy!!! I will keep you up to date if thats ok via private messages? I thought about getting some immigration advise from the CAB.

[Wanderer]

I'd wait for others, I've been wrong before!

I meant SET(M) too not SET(O).

[kairos]

Sorry Wanderer, but I don't think that is correct. She's been married to her British husband for two years but to gain ILR she has to have lived in the UK for two years with LLR on the basis of her marriage. The clock doesn't start ticking until after she's been issued the LLR visa she's currently waiting for.

It's my understanding that if her marriage breaks down whilst in the UK on LLR that's contingent upon that relationship, her leave will be revoked and she will have to return to her country of origin.

Rebers, I'm not passing any judgement on what you're doing- I understand that life is complex and sometimes puts us in situations that we couldn't imagine before finding ourselves in them. But, out of basic human concern for another's well-being, I encourage you to proceed carefully and not rush in. Ultimately, your only option may be for her to file for divorce and inform the HO of her situation. They will probably make her return to Thailand. Once her divorce is completed the two of you can marry and apply for a visa for her to join you in the UK.

This probably feels like too long a process for you and the idea of being seperated very unappealing. However, aside from the fact that you may not have any real alternative, it also gives you time to get some perspective, be absolutely sure that everything is exactly as it seems, and this is really what you want.

Good luck.

[Wanderer]

Sorry Wanderer, but I don't think that is correct. She's been married to her British husband for two years but to gain ILR she has to have lived in the UK for two years with LLR on the basis of her marriage. The clock doesn't start ticking until after she's been issued the LLR visa she's currently waiting for.

It's my understanding that if her marriage breaks down whilst in the UK on LLR that's contingent upon that relationship, her leave will be revoked and she will have to return to her country of origin.

Rebers, I'm not passing any judgement on what you're doing- I understand that life is complex and sometimes puts us in situations that we couldn't imagine before finding ourselves in them. But, out of basic human concern for another's well-being, I encourage you to proceed carefully and not rush in. Ultimately, your only option may be for her to file for divorce and inform the HO of her situation. They will probably make her return to Thailand. Once her divorce is completed the two of you can marry and apply for a visa for her to join you in the UK.

This probably feels like too long a process for you and the idea of being seperated very unappealing. However, aside from the fact that you may not have any real alternative, it also gives you time to get some perspective, be absolutely sure that everything is exactly as it seems, and this is really what you want.

Good luck.

I thought she and her husband had sent off form SET(M) which as I understand it gives her ILR assuming it's approved. OP says she's been married for two years.

Like I said tho - I am willing to accept I could be wrong!